Visit here for more on Ginger Vieira -- Type 1 diabetic, competitive powerlifter, and Cognitive Health Coach.

Who am I to tell a parent of a child with Type 1 diabetes to step back and allow their child to take on the responsibilities of this disease? I can only imagine what it’s like to watch your child grow up with a chronic illness, to watch them endure high blood sugars, and low blood sugars. Essentially, you’re watching them miss out on the freedom of being young, and careless. While most kids don’t begin thinking about death or weakness until their late teens or early twenties, children with diabetes come face to face with the fragility of their life on a daily basis.

 

But as a person who has lived with diabetes since before puberty, I absolutely believe that one of the most important things you must do as a parent of a child with diabetes is have confidence their ability to take care of themselves. And more importantly, show them you have confidence in their ability to take care of themselves by easing that responsibility onto their shoulders long before they leave the house for college.

 

They can handle it. It’s a lot, but they can and they will take on that responsibility.

 

Will they do it perfectly? No. Will they ever make mistakes? Yes. But that’s part of the process and it’s crucial that they go through it. One obvious reason why it’s important is because at some point they will go off to college and you won’t be able to look over their shoulder at their blood sugar readings, or tell them how many carbohydrates their eating and how much insulin to take.

 

The second reason, and most important reason in my opinion, is that the longer you wait to transition this responsibility, the more of a disservice you will do to your relationship with your child.

 

If you have been the main manager of their diabetes care up until age 18, when you send them off to college not only will they be balancing life around temptations to drink alcohol, smoke weed, and stay up all night with new friends, but they’ll suddenly be in charge of diabetes, too.

 

College has very few rules. Very few people watching over you. And plenty of temptations and risky fun.

 

You want to prevent piling the weight of managing the this disease onto their shoulders during the insanity of college life.

 

Now imagine if they had been in charge of their diabetes since the day they turned 10 years old. Counting their carbohydrates. Calculating their meal boluses, and preparing their blood sugar for exercise. At ten years old? Yes, that’s possible. I know your child can do it, but you have to have confidence in them, too, and they have to feel that confidence.

 

When it comes to the effect this transition will have on your family as a whole, I’m speaking specifically of whether diabetes will cause constant fighting and turmoil, or if it will just become a regular part of the family, part of life.

 

When you, the parent, are in charge of diabetes from Day 1 until your child goes off to college, you will be adding diabetes to an already well-fueled fire during that age where teenagers want freedom, independence, and want absolutely nothing to do with their parents. (I’m guilty of coping that 15-year old attitude, too, just ask my mom.)

 

Imagine being 15 years old, that wonderful phase where we are snotty and rude to our parents just because they ask us how our day was…and then imagine adding things like, “What’s your blood sugar? Did you take your insulin? Why were you low? Why were you high?”

 

Sooner or later, it is not uncommon for your child to use diabetes as a weapon of rebellion, of freedom, a way of saying, “I don’t have to do anything you say!”

 

It can tear your family dynamic apart and leave you in constant yelling matches. It doesn’t have to happen like this. And needless to say, it will hurt your child’s health as their blood sugars suffer the consequences of their rebellion.

 

I know it’s a scary thought to step back, to not ask about blood sugars and double-check insulin doses, but I believe it’s a huge part of ensuring that your child will take great care of themselves when they’re older.

 

Diabetes is their responsibility. I’ve seen many kindergarteners calculate their own boluses and count their own carbohydrates, because their parents gave them the freedom to learn, to be in charge. They are capable! You just have to give them the space to show you.

 

For more support on making this transition within your family, visit www.Living-in-Progress.com to read more on how Ginger provides Family Coaching and Diabetes Education consulting.